Tag Archives: football and sex

What is the Best Sex You’ve Ever Had? Was it Hall of Fame Worthy?

What is the Best Sex You’ve Ever Had? Was it Hall of Fame Worthy?

My newest Footballandsex.com blog ponders the characteristics that categorizes the best sex we’ve ever experienced.  It was influenced by the recent enshrinement of seven NFL athletes/coaches in the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

A few share their necessary adjectives and brief highlighted sexual experiences.  Add yours, I’m interested.


Sex and Football

Its time!

NFL and College Football is back!

The games are on, we’re cheering, yelling, praying and at times doing ridiculous rituals to promote our team to a victory.  Don’t forget the obsessive checking of our fantasy football stats.

In an article I wrote for the bleacher report, entitled ‘Football + Sex + Pastrami Sandwich = Heaven’

I allude to the pleasures of football, sex and food.  It appears easy to get the food aspect in during a game, yet what about sex?

Why do we need to skip sex while watching a football game or even wait until half-time?

One could easily have had sex on Saturday throughout the Michigan vs. Eastern Michigan game with a final score of Michigan 31 v. Eastern 3.  Or Purdue 59 v SE Missouri 0 (and Purdue’s even on their 3rd string QB,  SE must really stink). Or even Ohio State 6 v.  Miami (FL) 24 (so long Tressel)

Those games needed some spicing up.   Go ahead have a sex romp,  you aren’t going to miss much.

The field is open and so is your sex schedule.

It is much harder to determine the right time for sex when the game is really going: close calls, a tight game , killer plays and even injuries, we want to see it all!

Yesterdays Eagles 31 v. Falcons 35, was one such game, with Vicks head to head collision with his teammate that caused a concussion, its hard to take your eyes off the screen.  Well I guess when Vick walked off the field during the 3rd quarter we could’ve shifted our attentions, as the Eagles scored nothing in the last quarter.

Another exciting game played yesterday was by the Cardinals 21 v. Redskins 22, the fourth quarter was a nail biter and the Redskins came in for the win with a field goal.

So how do we go about getting the tri-fecta and more (football, sex, computer for fantasy stats, beer and food).

Timing and the sexual behavior which one engages in is key.

During an exciting game, go for the blow job.  Sit in your recliner, TV in front of you, computer/beer/food on table near you and the person of your fancy between your legs.  Remember to look down, don’t forget the hand in our hair, the moans and more. Plus if your partner doesn’t swallow, you’ll have napkins close by.

This morning I read an excellent erotic short story regarding oral sex and football, I highly recommend you click to read:

All in the Eyes

Another option is the handjob.  Get out some buffalo wings, turn on college ball and relive your old days with a handjob. I recommend lotion vs. KY lubes for a handjob.  It moisturizes your partners hands, smells good and leaves you nice and soft afterward without the need to clean up sticky lube.

When its getting later in the evening on a Sunday night (best and most popular time couples have sex in the U.S.), a great option is the rear entry or doggie style on the bed.  You and your partner face the screen,  enjoying intercourse with the game right in front of you.  Rear entry is one of the most popular positions for both males and females due to the intensity, tightness and friction.  Plus the male has two free hands to stimulate the breasts, buttocks, clitoris and more.

Enjoy football and get on your game!

Sex and Football what a great combo.


Catching Your Man…or the Average Joe at least.

Many tips discuss sexy outfits, flirtatiousness and being a challenge.

I, on the other hand, will add tips (some of them sexist…and yes I remain a feminist) to add to your chances of catching the man of your interest.

1. Set Realistic Expectations:

There is no man in shining armor.  If you want someone to rescue you, it will fail as only you can only rescue yourself.

No man is perfect.  He may be a knight in rusty armor: so look for smarts, sobriety, stability, humor, respect, openness, & playfulness. Pay attention to his history.  You can change no one, rescue no one.

No mate will ‘complete you’. Unlike the line in Jerry McGuire, “You complete Me”, its just a pipe dream.  A man can enhance your life, empower you, inspire you, care about you….yet not complete you.  You are responsible to fulfill yourself, complete yourself.  If you rely on another to meet all those needs, they will unfortunately fail you as no one person can do all that.

Constant Attention and Fawning is a NO GO.  If you want a slew of attention, then get it from multiple sources not just one person.  Yes we want a lot of attention from our date, partner, spouse, yet 100%  won’t happen.  They are not the fan club of one.

Different interest can enhance a relationship. Don’t mold to become a twin of your date. Be yourself. Have your own interest.   Share them, enjoy them on your own, keep that part of you.  Don’t lose yourself.

Your body is great just the way it is.  I hear too often in my practice, ‘well if I would loose a little weight’, ‘maybe if I got bigger boobs’, ‘why would he want to have sex with me with this body’.  If you change up your body, do it for health, do it because you feel good. You can have a ’10’ figure and your partner still may not be interested in you.  Remember beauty is not only on the outside.

Marriage isn’t happily ever after. Marriage is a lot of work.  It is not a destination.  Its is a life journey full of work, compromise, commitment, communication and hopefully lots of copulation. Yet the key word is work!  Stop chasing the ring. Chase your dream.  Enjoy your life with your partner.

2.Confidence and Smarts are Key

When you like who you are, know whats going on, and can have a decent intellectual conversation….you’re game!

No one wants a ding bat, a wimpy-whiney wendy, and a please validate that I don’t look fat in these jeans girl.

Have your own interests, hobbies, and friends.  Be independent.  Strive to learn. Participate in the community.  When you have these things, you open your self up to attraction.  Others will be attracted to you. Widen your circle, date, play.

Get educated, get smart, get confident!

3. Sex

This is another area where confidence and smarts will benefit you.

Don’t behave like your a raw piece of meat begging to be placed on his grill, saying ‘cook me’, ‘eat me’.  You don’t need to jump on the stripper pole, show you’re thong during the bend over, talk about giving the best blow job.  Take care of yourself, confidence exudes sexiness & be assertive NOT aggressive.  Just because he has sex with you doesn’t mean anything other than- you had sex.  Don’t use sex for validation.

Have sex because you’re interested, being safe (birth control), aware of the complications,want to share yourself with this person.

Enjoy your body and the pleasure it brings. Share yourself openly, respectfully, playfully.

Enjoy full body love play.

Feel confident in your sexual skills.  Enjoy giving as much as receiving.  Men like blow jobs; we like to see pleasure on our partners face.

Every man enjoys a confident and smart woman who loves giving blow jobs.

4. Food

We all love food.

Start cooking.

Enjoy food, savor it, cook it, eat it.

We all like a good cook, a great hostess, and eating with a partner who enjoys flavor, texture, complexity, wine pairings and more.  Plus who doesn’t love a nice full belly.

My mother used to say ‘The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach’, this has merit even today.

5. Football

You may not be a sports fan, yet if you open up and learn, you and your partner can have a great time together.  Attending sporting events has a fun social atmosphere, cheer, and is a great date.  Football is one of the best sports. Its exciting and  action packed!  Men on the field, tight pants, meaty muscles, sweat dripping down, Foh yeah….need I say more!  If football isn’t your thing, try out other sports, baseball, racing, basketball, and even golf.  Women who like the game, show game!

6. Genuineness and Fun

No need to put on an act, be yourself.

Have fun.

Be open to new experiences.

Tips to Catching Your Man:

1. Realistic Expectations

2. Confidence and Smarts

3. Sex

4. Food

5. Football/Sports

6. Genuineness and Fun

Have more tips?  Share!


Performance Pressure: Jay Cutler Style….and yours?

Many have speculated on Chicago Bears Quarter Back, Jay Cutlers, football performance for this upcoming season

All eyes are watching….will he flop (yes I know he was injured) as he did in last seasons NFC championship game?

Saturdays preseason game, the  Bears v. Bills, showed only a little Cutler action.

He was off the field after only one series (yes I know its preseason, but most of us wanted a least a little more of his time on the field).

According to AP Writer Andrew Seligman, “The way Cutler was running around, it sure felt like last season. Sacked a league-leading 52 times a year ago, there wasn’t much he could do Saturday with the defense bearing down on him. At least this one didn’t end with a knee injury or with the outside attacks on his toughness, as his previous appearance at Soldier Field…”

To top that off, the Bears Beat  noted Cutler in their  “Hall of Shame” statistic: “FOX displayed a graphic that noted that Cutler is the first Bears quarterback in franchise history to pass for more than 3,000 yards in consecutive seasons, which he did between 2009 and 2010. That clearly defines just how bad quarterbacking has been in this city for so long because that statistic is awful. Some franchises have consecutive 3,500- to 4,000-yard passers these days.”

Even with a Bears win, Cutler remains under the microscope for his performance.

Three more preseason games to go before his official launch on September 11th against the Falcons.

That’s when we’ll see Cutler’s real performance.

Aren’t you glad you aren’t under such pressure (maybe you wouldn’t mind with his paycheck)?

Yet, sometimes you ARE under such pressure; its just different circumstances with  less viewers, limited critics, and a few fans.

Its the pressure men place on themselves in the bedroom, on their sex life!

Imagine being Cutler and  having a whole field, sport pundits, fans and TV viewers to rely on you, grade your performance, and even let others know their full opinion of your game play.

Luckily, in our sex lives, its a much more private affair.  Despite this privacy, men tend to put high pressures on themselves as if they were in Cutlers shoes.

The pressure is on!

You may be thinking of:

Your erection (will it get up, come on get up, whats your problem! better stay hard, better use it quick before it goes down)

Your  ability to orgasm or not to orgasm too quickly (don’t cum, don’t cum, wait, wait….oops)

Whether you’re partner is enjoying the sex

Will you get more sex

Will she/he be pleased

Will you have the right moves (your hands, tongue, mouth, penis)

When one focuses so much on the ‘performance’ aspect of sex, they loose the perspective of pleasure and having good sex  (which is what we all want right?).

So we’re lucky, limited viewers, low pressure, with the only exception…..the pressure you place upon yourself.

Penises can be like adolescents, if you tell them to do something, they often want to do just the opposite.

If you focus so much on an erection, your penis will make up his own stubborn mind and it often isn’t the answer you want.

If you are worried about ejaculating then you have again started the mind game that takes your focus off of your partner, your pleasure, enjoyment and satisfaction, and instead on the ‘end result’.

If the only goal of sex was to have an orgasm, most of us would just stick with masturbation, as an orgasm is near guaranteed with ourselves.

We want sex with others because it heightens our pleasure, our experience and adds a whole new dimension.

Switch your brain to these questions:

Does this feel good?

Do I like this touch/stimulation?

Am I enjoying touching my partner?

Is this fun/passionate/open/respectful?

If you answer YES to these questions, then performance is OUT of the window and pleasure is IN!

Many in sports psychology will tell you that the person has to shut out the criticism, the viewers, and being under the microscope of fame, and to instead focus only on the task at hand.

You. The Ball. The Team. The PLAY.

In the bedroom, it is best to focus on:

You. Your Partner. Pleasure.  PLAY!

So lets excitedly watch the Bears this season.

Jay Cutler will do whatever he can do, even with the pressure. (cautiously optimistic)

You on the other hand can choose if pressure is a part of your style…..or if you would rather choose PLEASURE.


2011 Fantasy Football: Get Your Fantasy and Game on with 12 Draft Tips

 Its prime time to draft your players and teams for this years fantasy  football.  

NFLsoup.com listed “Draft Tips for Success”, providing 12 tips to create  your dream team.

As a sex therapist, I’d like to think these 12 steps can also aid us in our sexual  fantasies.

As fantasy is a natural part of who we are; engaging in fantasy is  arousing, creative, free and pleasurable.

Here’s the 12 fantasy football draft tips for both football fans with my version for our own private fantasies.

 

1. Don’t Wing It.

Strategy is important when selecting your team, yet in the role of fantasy:

Spontaneity Rules.

Just think of the ease with which a new fantasy can enter our mind: walking down the street, sitting in the doctors office, attending a sporting event, and more.

The beauty in our environment can easily spark multiple fantasies per day.

Some will be fleeting, whereas others you can stock away for your fantasy file for later “use”.

 

2. Don’t Go Through the Motions.

In fantasy, as in life, we must manage our impulses.

Many times we can’t act when sexual thoughts comes to our mind.

When the time and place are right, go for it.

Enjoy the fantasy.

Revel.

Experience the sensations and imagery you have created while skipping out on any robotic or habitual tendency.

Focus on the pleasure our mind and body can provide.

 

 

 

3. Don’t Worry about Bye Weeks.

Just as some of our favorite teams get a break.

So does our fantasy life.

Your mind may feel limited, your libido down, or you may struggle with an ability to “perform” with yourself or your partner.

Life happens.

Even the best of lovers have bad sex 15% of the time.

The more you obsess, the worst it can get.

Go with the flow, be patient with your self, and be open to pleasure not performance.

 

 

4. Get the Best Talent Available.

A common sexual fantasy is to have sex with a famous person.

It is near impossible to actually have sex with a Victoria Secret model or top actress, yet when it comes to our mind-

We really CAN get the best talent available.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. Keep your Options Open.

Some may feel uncomfortable fantasizing about someone other than their partner.

This is only problematic if it becomes an obsessive focus or you act on your fantasy, which may threaten a monogamous

relationship.
So, if you can control yourself… grab healthy adult images that stimulate you and go for it.

This also applies to sexual behaviors which you may never dream of doing in real life yet turns you on during fantasy, such as an orgy, stranger sex, being tied up, spanked, or public sex.

When it stays in your mind, almost anything is an option.

 

 

6. Take Some Chances.

If you have a solid relationship with your partner, you may open up and suggest you share your fantasies.

You both might decide to keep it private or even act out a fantasy, as long as it remains adult, consensual and respectful to all parties involved.

If you get turned on by costumes and would love to see your partner dressed as a cheerleader, let her know.

Taking a chance might lead to some fun exploration and add spice to your sex life.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

7. Get a Rookie

The Internet offers a variety of images to stimulate our imagination.

Check out the new up and coming pornography stars or even amateur porn.

You might even want to ask your partner if they would be open to video taping your love play, that way, the rookie is you.

Get in bed, grab some champagne, and bring out the video recorder. (privacy is essential, pay attention to what you do with the video after)

 

 

 

 

8. Balance Beats Elite

Anything in life which we take to an extreme can cause problems.

If we use fantasy to frequently avoid our real life and our partner, it will likely lead to problems.

Fantasy, erotic imagery, and sex CAN be fully enjoyed in a balanced manner.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

9. Wait Till the End for the Kicker

There doesn’t seem much difference between the top kickers and the average guy.

In fantasy football, you can relax a bit and choose the kicker in the end. I

n dating and relationships, don’t underestimate the beauty of seemingly average women.

An average kicker, can surprise us and win the game, an average woman may even win your heart.

 

 

10. Mock Mock Till You Drop

“Overall, practice makes perfect, so it only makes sense to practice drafting a few times before the real thing goes down.” nflsoup.com

Fantasy, Masturbation, Adult Consensual Sex.

Be Smart.

Be Safe.

Have fun with your “Practice”.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

11. READ the Papers.

Study, educate yourself on good sexual health practices, and learn about our bodies.

Understand what are sexual myths and develop a realistic sexual view.

What a fun and important topic to keep up to date.

 

 

 

 

12. Have Fun!

What is sex without fun?

Enjoy your body.

Laugh.

Explore.

Fantasy is fun…..as is football.

Have a blast with your fantasy football team, your fantasies, and your intimate life.

GAME ON!


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